Belgian wife

A doctor asks the Belgian wife of a

patient who is 42 ° C but appears in full

form:

Doctor, as my husband is sensitive

cold, I warmed a little

thermometer before putting it in place.

Favorite pastimes

Television interviews the last descendant
of a noble family, which celebrates its 100th
birthday.
- In your younger days, which were
your favorite pastimes?
- Women and hunting.
- And what do you hunt?
- Women!

I feel bad

Doctor, doctor, everyone said
I feel bad ...You tried to wash?Yes, but it does not work, after a
months it again.

The widow doubt

The old man just died. the priest
do not praise:
- What was good husband, and what a good
Christian, and how he loved his
children, etc. ...
Finally, the widow doubt. it
looks at a child and told him
ear
- Go to the coffin and take a look at
inside to see if it's your father
that is in there.

Frozen lake

An elephant and a mouse are
the edge of a frozen lake. Elephant hesitate to
rush. Mouse reassures:
- I'll go first, she said, to
see if the ice holds up!

Sign of intelligence

A bald old minesweeper on top
head of a young girl who meets him
notes that it has lost hair on
the top of the skull.
- But it is a sign of intelligence!
- Yes, but then you're a bit stupid on
the edges!

How

How do we marry
young woman, beautiful, rich and intelligent?
We get married four times.

Difference between a blonde and a pizza

What is the difference between a blonde
and a pizza? Pizza, you can have
without chamignons.

Mr Dugenou

Mr Dugenou done service

in an infantry regiment. his sister

just died in a car accident

car, but he does not know yet. its

Colonel learns via Brigade

Police and summoned Warrant Officer

week:

- Warrant Officer Lafleur!

- Aye sir!

- Tell me, Lafleur's sister Dugenou

died this morning. I made you

call for you to announce her

new tactfully. Is a Dugenou

sensitive boy, and you know the

household.

- Lafleur leaves the office of Colonel and is

sound gathering. Once before

the assembled company, he shouts:

- The ceusses whose sister died, a

step forward!

Nobody moves.

- Dugenou! You have fifteen days

hole for not obeying orders.

The general forces UN

This is the general forces

UN to inspect the ranks. it

approaches the Russian soldier to guard him

you ramrod straight. He takes his

Kalashnikov and puts a big hit

in the back. The soldier did not flinch and

the general asked:

- Does it hurt?

- Nyet Comrade General

- Why did not you hurt?

- Because Russian soldiers fear

no pain!

He then approaches the U.S. takes

his colt and puts a big hit on the

head. The soldier did not flinch and

General asked:

- Does it hurt?

- No sir

- Why did not you hurt?

- Because U.S. soldiers

fear not the pain

He then approaches the French, takes

rifle bayonet and plant it in the

foot. The soldier did not flinch and

General asked:

- Does it hurt?

- No sir

- Why did not you hurt?

- Because I put on the 39 and the idiots

Stewardship my donated 44.

Vagabond

This is a man who leaves a supermarket and sees
a bum grazing the grass. So this gentleman,
wanting to do a good deed he has to come and eat
home. Happy, vagabond asks if he can come up with
his wife and five children. That's when the man himself
says: "But there is no problem, I have at least 25 acres
tall grass in my garden ... "

Cannibal tribe

In a cannibal tribe in Africa, it was the lack of
victims. Then the chief sent his best hunting
hunters. But they did not come with a little while
Ethiopian skinny. The Cuistot then told his aides:
- Stir it slowly to avoid meat is all
dissolved in water. And then add lots of potatoes.
Like that, it will make it a little more.
After half an hour, the chef comes and sees his two
aid brew water as raging ...
- But what do you do, fuckers!
- But chief, if brews more slowly, it begins to eat
all potatoes!

Honey

Honey, when you're of the same opinion as me, I feel
I was wrong.

The bear and the rabbit

A bear poops in the forest when a small
White Rabbit is also next to him. The bear asks the
rabbit:
- It does not bother you, who is so small and all white, the
splashes when you do your needs.
The rabbit replied simply:
- No, I'm used to. So the bear grabs the rabbit and wipes with.

Official

The official is a great husband!
When he returned in the evening he is not tired
and has already read the newspaper.

Physicians

There are several categories of physicians, and can be
differentiated as follows:
General - know nothing and do little
Surgeons - know little but can do everything
Internal - know everything but do nothing
Pathologists - know everything and can do everything, but
usually it is too late.